I drank too much. My snot smells like vodka when I blow my nose.
how do you have sooo much energy?
billy mays threw in a lil somethin extra when i ordered some oxiclean last week
still doesn't change the fact you were dunking your sock in the toilet.
We turned everything surrounding BP and the oil leak into a "that's what she said" drinking game. We've been drunk for a month
I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
No, I don't not want an upside down piggyback ride. You're drunk and there are rocks.
He looked at my vag and said "you have a nice situation down there. Good work"
When I found her she was drinking wine out of a plastic bag in a bathroom stall, staring at herself in the mirror and crying hysterically. Cabo does things to a person...
him being a republican bothers me way more than his coke problem.
At one point 12 people dressed in care bear onesies were up on stage grinding super nasty, and two of the girl Care Bears were making out.
If this wasn't a hallucination, we need to go to this magical kingdom every night of the week.
So I got my junk pierced since we've fucked. You should get in on this.
On the upside, no one went to the hospital! Lex's friend was definitely on fire at one point last night though because he tried to juggle tiki torches. He was shirtless this morning and smelled like a BBQ.
I joined the mile high club last night. I ran a mile while high on coke. It was glorious
SOS... STANDING IN THE BAR NEXT TO MY BF AND THE GUY WHO I HOOKED UP WITH ON CHRISTMAS DAY..
nyquil+orgasm=very intense and oddly interesting
Randomize
