i'll give you all the meat in my fridge in exchange for 2 condoms.
Piggyback rides are my preferred mode of transportation.
Is it sad that I find it completely normal that I just took batteries out of a vibrator to put them in a pencil sharpener so I could do homework?
I find this completely acceptable.
I started the year with 2,800 dollars and am now down to 83 dollars-one of which i use to snort my focalin. I have given up on food and am perplexed as to how I can make 82 dollars last more than two weekends for booze
dude I heard her through my door. She sounded like you were holding her head under water and they letting her up for air. I recorded that shit
he came on my stomach, took his sock off, wiped it up, put his sock back on along with his shoes and left.
His roomates just started party boying me. He stood there with the look of horror on his face.
you fucked my boyfriend. margarita girls night will not fix this.
college stoner meal of the day: microwaved nutrigrain bars
how many lesbians have to have their hearts broken before they realise I am not that kind of DJ
The plan is that you eat an edible first, then pressure your dad to do one. You know you are down.
Dear god. Please. Please do NOT deprive yourself of dick for 90 days. Blood will spill. Wolverines will howl. I can't handle that kind of terror.
That's not as bad as watching a dumb ass drunk peeing into your window fan -
my roommates are pretty pissed at me. they sent me out for ice and i came back with a kitten.
In a few weeks I'll be a beautiful butterfly and me and my cat will have to repopulate the earth. WE WILL REBUILD!!
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