I thought she had blonde hair
No, Gonorrhea actually
I'm ready for my liver to be the last casualty of 2009
you were holding her hair as she threw up saying "I'm going to be a great doctor" repeatedly.
You talked to that cop for like 15 minutes and when you got back, you told us you were "networking".
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
The last thing I remember before blacking out was telling Jamie that she was too fat even for my standards. The first thing I remember after blacking out was waking up next to her.
I'm going to do lines of vitamin c I cannot be sick for halloween
I used that money i stole from the stripper last night to pay for my date tonight.
And I feel like pitchers of margaritas accidentally make it down your throat a lot.
I mean, the lady at the Mexican restaurant insisted. She said she would win a prize if she sold another pitcher before noon. And plus I got to wear a sombrero
We finally have the house to ourselves and your out playing Lance Fucking Armstrong
Finishing last nights 1.5L of wine and beef jerky for breakfast. Work looms, ever the prickly bitch.
Bought asot tix too. After Saturday I'm gonna be reborn like Jesus and no drugs until edc
I walked around with red solo cups on my feet, weeds tied around my neck and a tree in my hand
I can't possibly be the only person who has ever eaten Cheetos with a spoon to avoid the powder getting in my fingers
Yeah. Of all the things to be cock blocked by a plague is the most unexpected.
Randomize
