I just saw a guy masturbating vigorously at the bus stop across from del taco at 2:30am...im pretty sure he wasn't even homeless
I'm going to be blunt here. I don't actually care what you're doing tonight. I just need to know if I need to shave or not.
I have to stop drunkenly making out with guys just because they're tall or have a beard.
And I just had to awkwardly tell 3 police officers that I was having sex and not in any trouble
...im seriously confused as to why this doesn't make sense to you. Girl hostage, rob casino. Makes perfect sense.
I want a calm night. Not one where I wake up to you topless and bloody.
I wonder what chicks would think if they learned that when we add them on fb we email their bikini pics to each other.
Go big or go home. Or get a live in house boy you met 7 years ago and feel like you have unfullfilled potential. You know, the usual
We were destined to go to rehab together
Yeah play it cool maybe put in a kissy face though let him know you're giving an invitation for his dick
I'm gonna forget you just shared your personal blowjob aesthetic with me and move on
I need to just embrace dildos and cats and call it a life.
seriously considering getting an electric blanket rather than sleeping with guys this winter for warmth.
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
last night you made out with a 19 year old on a bar and i woke up with a swede in my bed. lets just say that never happened.
Randomize