I have a very awkward question for you. Could you possibly take my black dildo. My mom wants to clean my room.
I was hoping we just happened to wake up naked and I hadn't fucked him.... no such luck.
You handed some guy a spoon you found, he yelled SPOON GAME, and then the two of you spent the next 20 minutes throwing spoons all over the kitchen.
I dont think she was a real nurse but she was good at it. wish I rememebrd her name
I held his ankles while he hung off the top bunk attempting to get my pillow that fell off.
Just so we're clear. I'm still making jello shots and bringing them to the bar in my purse. I don't care if its half off margaritas. Don't want anyone thirsty
He's freaking out just because my cat licked his balls while he was fucking me
I just put Gatorade in my wine, cause electrolytes, you know.
Lol I wish they went straight to your cock then shot out into my mouth like a cock nacho dispenser
I hope. Last year I got lost in New Orleans and some guy named Cookie walked me home while I cried.
I lost a fight last night. By that I mean I head butt the bar and busted my lip open.
he's so sweet and its so cute. but I swear to fuck if I let my guard down and this was all a lie I am going to become a serial killer.
ayo
its like you know when i get waxed
Oh don't mind my cushion, I got plowed in the ass by a freight train last night
she filled my toilet with birdseed... i tried flushing it but now it's clogged so she has to come over and fix it because it was her mistake in the first place
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