I just googled how to quit your job and cause a big uproar at the same time....i tell you how tomorrow goes, i'm so excited....
How is it that lesbians won't hit on me at a gay club, but they'll hit on me every time I go to Walmart?
Dude you have to stop using "I eat good pussy" as a pick up line
Is it sad that I just used my electrical knowledge to not only fix but improve my vibrator?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Best dream ever last night. You moved here. Your Spanish name meant highway. Your favorite food was styrofoam.
I woke up to him peeling the skin on my stomach from my sunburn. If he wasn't so good in bed I'd be a little freaked out.
I mean, I'm twenty four years old and I've never paid for my own drink. You can't say that any of your ex girlfriends boobs are THAT great.
Throwing up so forcefully that toilet water hits you in the face is not what the Pilgrims and Indians had in mind for this holiday
She wanted me to watch her masterbate and after she thanked me for a wonderful evening and left. This state is weird.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I shit you not ... they just advertised a recruiting service for strippers at this concert.
Just got high and apologized to my vagina for getting chlamydia
come over we're fb stalking guys who were dressed as bananas last night because i can't remember which one i blew
If I die it's either cuz I undercooked my burger or because I used questionable cheese. I have no pants on, so if there's a wellness check, you go in first.
He has a baby picture of himself on the night stand. I don't think this whole 'one night stand' thing is for me.
You're breaking my sexual little heart
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