you definitely held a convo with a hobo
we have a secret handshake
the not having weed thing wouldnt be nearly as tragic if it wasnt the one holiday where they launch bright flaming things into the air
I am totally the chick from Intervention who barfs up wine and then re-eats it.
It was like riding a jackhammer on a train during an earthquake. THAT amazing.
He graduated with honors. I've seen him kneeboard on dry ground and run a razor scooter into a wall...anyone can graduate with honors
yea last night was a repeat of newyears...exept this time it ivolved a fish costume, throw up, a hole in the roof, and cops...lots of cops
I guess I was trying to make a cheese sandwich, I had to change my sheets cuz I slept on it and the cheese melted all over me, Dave, and my bed
Well it's been 24 hours and I still feel like a mammoth sat on my balls
My dad is so drunk he attempted to ride my two year old cousin's tricycle. For a solid five minutes.
I just held a marble with my kegel muscles for 5 min. You may call me COCKCLAMP 9000!!!!
I think pretend fucking a camel is a good thing to do downtown. They loved me.
Based on your 5AM twitter activity I gather you found MORE FREE COKE??
You're the second person to offer to fuck me in the bathroom at work. Idk whether I should feel honored, or if cvs is just a turn on.
Nice. I like it when Maker's Mark makes decisions for you.
Let this be a lesson to you, parmesan cheese crumbles are not a good substitute for coffee creamer, no matter how high you are
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