so i am drinking whiskey and watching home alone 2 by myself. it turns out moving to a foreign country isn't all that different after all.
Have u Seen that eharmony commercial where the guy goes " I don't know how I could love her anymore, but tomorrow I will'. Yeah that guy should kill himself
As long as you don't die I'm in full support of your drinking decisions
Its that time of year where we just drink more instead of dressing warmer
A guy wearing a hard hat while floating the river. It's the most responsible drinking we saw all day.
I think as far as last words to bitter ex girlfriends go, "enjoy that staph infection youre about to get in your uterus" is right up there with the best
Hey, hey, hey, hey. This is a hurriCAN.
And by "schedule" I meant crumbled up liquor store receipt, that I wrote shit on.
He fucks like those drill things that you see when you think of texas
I smell like hot dogs and captain morgan it's 11:20 am what is my life
You know you're doing well in life when weed is considered to improve your job performance
you missed 2am bagpipes and my roommate looking hot as fuck in a kilt
Dude, naked camping ALWAYS takes precedence. I would skip my own funeral to go naked camping.
I'm tired, but I'm gonna go with "I watched the debate last night and part of my soul died"
Three cheers for handling my crush on my boss in an entirely reasonable manner, by having a threesome with my coworkers.
Randomize
