My carpet still smells like piss and I THINK YOU KNOW WHY.
too bad they don't have a 'people you may be able to do' thing on facebook. it would save me a lot of fucking time.
it's not gay if you rub your penis between their butt cheeks and pretend they are tits
From now on, just let me go home. I'm tired of hooking up with your roommates... Including you.
vegan vag taste different. and not a good different
This glow in the dark vibrator will get me through this power outage
if i actually bought condoms for every time i had sex, i could single handedly fix the economy
HIS TAN HAS PUT ME TO SHAME. HE TOOK HIS PANTS OFF AND HIS DICK LOOKED LIKE A GHOST
I'm starting a point system. For every 2 beer runs i do for u slackers i get a free bottle of Barefoot.
I haven't had a normal poop since halloween, we are not mixing vodka and tequila ever again
RESPECT THE VODQUILA
There are people taking shots out of a turtle shell.
I own a halfway home for drunk girls, this is my life
You were fine, but your knee injury definitely came from interpretive dancing like a gay fairy with lead wings all around the Mission St BART. Everyone thought you were on drugs.
it looks like a nuclear can of fuck blew up in here
The neighbors ahemed the WHOLE time. Their kids are the ones that scream loud enough for me to remember my birth control. It's payback!
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