U know its gonna be a great day when the guy at the liquor store waves at u cause u walked by
My toast was "here's to being positive, and testing negative... Cheers!"... after that chick gagged on her shot, everyone knew.... slut.
I think his glow in the dark Star Wars sheets, at the time, really turned me on.
Does puking on your bio final mean I can retake it?
how do you feel about lunch break shots ?
Okay, just a casual question: how did i manage to get grass stains on the inside of my bra?
on a scale of 1 to 'no sex' how busy are you this week?
If it carries over into the weekend I would be glad to nurse your vagina back to health.
Look. If you're going to be my girlfriend you need to be down with me licking BBQ off your face infront of kids.
Bro my mom is in for two days and you can't even hold back on the drinking she said as she left i hope he doesn't always pee his pants and he is sure popular with the girls wtf
After the party last night, I dreamt I continued drinking... Apparently my subconscious didn't think I'd had enough...
Can we just smoke a few bowls and eat grilled cheese while drunk in our hotdog suits at 9am ?
he wouldnt let me in bed until i took off all the stickers i was covered in
How do I let my trainer know I'm only at the gym so I can get in more intense sex positions?
The weekend was a blur. There was vodka and penises and orgasms. I played a game of Cock Roulette and won big
Randomize
