I think someone spiked my drink last night. .. Like all 20 of them.
he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
we are cloud gazing and there is one that looks like a giant baby riding a dolphin and smoking a joint
i wish there was a reasonable explanation for why this reminds me of you
oh my god its dad's weekend for the sororities i can't wait to throw up in front of all these parents
If i evwr doyble fist jack daniels and smirnoff again, i hereby give you permission to take them both away grom me and give me and give me a glass of wat
Thanks for putting pants on me last night. And for calling me a princess.
Ryab! Make hr wtop. Mshe make sme speee. I don want to pee. I want sev. He was so igbad. Redpo.
I think it's god's punishment for my behavior in Vegas . Lies were told. Angels were defiled. Pools were pissed in
It's not your birthday unless mom picks you up at the bar
in other news i got caramel vodka poured on me. upside, i smell amazing
After we had sex he began to tell me the craziest places he's had sex. He told me KFC bathroom so I rolled over and went to sleep.
Also I will be receiving my own bra in the mail because I left it at his place, woops
Just escaped from the ER. Meet me at the bar in 20 minutes.
Don't worry about it too much, but I just committed us to possibly raising a kid
dude the water is back on, you can stop shitting under the tree . . .
Randomize
