Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
chris hansen is no longer pursuing child predators.let's celebrate
i'll bring the hard lemonade and lube
he was going down on me when he saw the warts...nevertheless he told me he had to pick his sister up from school. why does this keep happening to me???
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
you scanned your fake to get into the dorm last night and when the lady told you it was the wrong card you looked at her and said this is who i am thursday night
My mom's mothers day present consisted of a card, chocolate and the rose bush I threw up in as I was getting in last night. She loved it.
Ps. The strap-on in the pic i sent you last night was not mine. Just wanted to clear that up.
You peed in my camelbak and said it was a reverse catheter. Not cool.
You kept telling me how warm your bag of vomit was and asked me if i wanted to feel.
I'm pretty sure the guy she brought home is a polish porn star..
just start off by saying "hey, i cockblocked my friend last night and need to make it up to him, could you help?"
Wearing a french maid costume for Halloween sure did help me meet girls
Dude, they all thought you were gay.
I just sugar scrubbed my vagina. If I don't get laid tonight, me and the universe are gonna have some problems.
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
Well supposedly when the cops came, they say I tried to get them in a conga line like Jim Carrey in The Mask. So....yea
Randomize
