Yeah and Nick is shooting his loaded 9mm in his backyard.
Unmistakable female orgasm noises coming from upstairs shower
She must've brought a toy -- seriously doubt that he's up to the task
Nights like last night are what makes cleaning up the vomit in the morning worth it
I'll show rhose boucners: You don't let me in, I poop on your pool.
but he used his one phone call to call mom and wish her happy mothers day, that's gotta count for somethin
then he tried to tell me how many times he had seen Scott's dick. his estimate was about 180 times. he thought I didn't understand.
Currently separating the burrito I just stuffed in my purse from the weed in my half smoken bowl that was already in it. My what the fuck moment beats yours.
I wonder if our vaginas are like "o thank god, no strangers breaking in tonight." Baahhhh sooo bad
the condom is still stuck, that's what I get for being responsible
Ohhh. Its been awhile. Vending machine hotel condoms are $15 here who can afford to not get herpes?
My left boob kept making random appearances last night.
Kelly and I just had sex, and you didn't call or text to interrupt, are you alive? We are both concerned.
It was a glorious ass. He has amazing hands. I want to fuck him until he can't do math anymore.
I wouldn't have found her if it wasn't for the vomit trail leading into my brother's room.
Dude I just woke up with a dog sleeping on me.
I thought you didnt have a dog??
Exactly.
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