i love how you can even make your typing come across bitchy
He famously once noted that women should wear white "like all other domestic appliances,"
my math teacher staples burger king applications to failed tests
Why do you proceed to call me "Queen La Queefah?"
I was wondering where I've seen this kid then I remembered I saw him doing lines of blow of his gf's leg while she was sleeping last week.
shes perfect for him. shes never seen a penis so she has nothing to compare his to.
she just came into my room, drunkenly shoved six dollars into my bra and told me to spend it on chicken wings.
Well... this vagina won't eat itself
I just puked in my non fat yogurt... But it's non fat in hopes that someone wants to eat my vagina
tell me why they applauded then the bartender locked himself in the bathroom when i walked into the bar today ????
Looks like a took a video of myself beating off and passed out last night. I'm classy.
hey if you're going to the hospital do you wanna pick me up a taco on your way back
I'm still getting random messages from guys about my Halloween outfit. Electrical tape is coming back next year
I don't blame you. I made YouTube videos of me singing Rent songs then slept with a married couple. Fucking tequila.
yeah the highlight of my day was the 911 operator telling me they had frantically been trying to figure out where i was
you were peeing in her backyard and some dude came outside and looked at you and was like "thats not a pee spot" and you said "well it is now" then i joined you. Forever poppin squats <3
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