she says it's "been amazing lately"
i think basically because i hate her so much i'm trying to break her in half
She walked in the room and sighed really loudly fishing for attention. but I didn't bite cuz I don't give a fuck what's wrong with her.
Dude you just tried to have a one night stand with my ex girlfriend while we were trying to put you to bed upstairs.
but that still doesn't explain how i woke up on the couch down stairs.
I mean I knew we were putting on quite a show but I didnt realize HOW good until I woke up and 4 people were passed out with their ears to the bedroom door.
Definately going to wake up wondering what happened to the other half of my lip.
There's some drunk girl alone in the field, she looks like she could use some help.
Also it's only fair that you know that that girl is me.
just made one giant jello shot... if i have to study on a saturday night, i'm gonna do it as drunk as possible
Let me shower first- i smell like sex and rock climbing (not so sure how that happened)
I'm not sure how many more innuendos I can slip into this fucking conversation before I just blatantly say "I want to fuck you."
Not sure how ur night is going, but unless u also saw a naked drunk chick pissing outside i doubt it can top mine
Today's goals: get day drunk then sober up in time for the walking dead tonight.
So you're not opposed to us ever having sex again? Because it just seems like such a waste to let a penis like yours go.
Afterwards I drank a whole bottle of cake vodka in the bathtub while he was bawling his eyes out. Hands down weirdest hookup I've ever had.
You know that pill i snorted last night? Yeh, its just hitting me now..... At work
I don't think there's a ladylike way to tell this guy I want to sit on his face
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