I think we should go ahead and pin a note to my shirt when we go out that says"do NOT buy me shots"
On the back we can put possible side effects may include: indiscriminate making out, brief crying spells, yelling in jibberish, and sudden sleep.
question: does your pee smell like mojitos at all?
Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game
Just heard the new 'We are the world' ... Can I get my 10 bucks for Haiti back?
He seriously just asked the doctor if taking the medicine for chlamydia was going to cut into his drinking time. Never let it be said that he is not dedicated.
Nothing like an old fashioned, wine fueled, anxiety-cry in the shower to start off finals week.
It's 6 a.m. ... what the hell.
This may be hard to believe, but that wasn't the first time I was fingered under a snuggie
It's not
He goes "hi, free today?" WHEN AM I EVER FREE ON A SATURDAY, I GOT HUNGOVER TO BE AND DRUNK TO GET.
Just saw Santa sitting on a restaurant patio drinking beer and using his free hand to gesture to cars that he's watching them
Pants off. Spirits lifted.
Of course I have a pirate flag
Woke up on the floor with shoes on my hands...I'd say it was a success
All I know is that I have a black eye and an extra $200 in my wallet. Other than that, clueless.
What's an appropriate gift to bring to my boyfriend's wife's baby shower?
Shame?
Just so we're clear, drunk and naked is not appropriate attire for Thanksgiving. Do it this year and Grandma will ban you for life.
Randomize
