R and i have drinken 4 bottles od red wine. By ourselfs
It's amazing how much jurassic park has contributed to my life recently
AHHHH!!! note to self never google image chastity belt omfg
a queef is a wish your heart makes.
a hangover this bad deserves a feeding tube
I always enjoy the bewildered gaze as I buy chips, salsa and beer @ 0745.
No I have an idea, I saw you running through the neighborhood at 3am while I searched for my flip flops in a ditch
this is the first time in over a year I had a pregnancy scare and actually would have known who the father was. I guess this is what adulthood feels like.
I seriously had alll four of your knuckles bruised into my arm
There's always a silver lining when massive voluptuous tits are involved
In retrospect, vomiting out of a moving vehicle on the third date should have been a deal breaker
why do i have a pole dance champion shot glass?
This is a long quiet interstate without somebody to sext.
It was like a single vaginal boat in a sea of one eyed monsters
only i would get cock blocked by a cop
Randomize
