all i need in life is blowjobs and white cheddar cheezits
There are walks of shame and then there are walks of what the hell is wrong with you.
Okay, good. And if you have one of those portable strip poles that would be nice too.
There's no point in calling it Big Titties Tuesday if girls with big tits don't get anything special
Do what? I was just saying that at some point there's a chance I'll have a boner. Think of it like a guessing game. "Does he have one now?"
I hope you get some kind or rare disease that makes your dick ties itself in a knot for fucking her you lucky bastard.
Yeah. I asked if there was a finger in my ass at some point or if I had a weird dream. So far he hasn't responded
Sorry i vommed in a cup next to u w out warning.. Actually im not that sorry cuz i didn't spill a drop LIKE A PRO
If I learned anything from that one time I saw the last 10 minutes of oprah when they talked about the secret, it is that you project what you receive back. I also have wine.
I just shotgunned a beer and my lipstic didnt BUDGE. MERICUHH
I had sex on a seadoo on the middle of the lake lastnight
About to wash down a xan with an iced pumpkin spiced latte from starbs and I feel like I've never lived up to my stereotype so much at one time
it was weird i started the party in just my underwear and woke up in my clothes
I got here. Mom yelled "drink of the day is blueberry sangria" and next thing I knew I was on a slip and slide.
I bonged champagne. And did keg stands. What in the actual fuck am I doing with my life?
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