I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
It just hit me that i made out with someone's mom last night
I'm picking out a half way decent top so if I get arrested I'll have a respectable mug shot photo. Always be prepared.
25 Men Talk About the First Time They Went Down On A Woman
You were too busy being proud of your penis shaped pancakes to notice...
Ended the weekend putting away 30 nuggets. Training for 100.
I'm pretty sure we got the cab driver deported
Trying to grind with crutches was not a success
Did you like my voicemail? Sounded like I was being murdered, right?
By a pack of ravenous dildos
23 Ex Fraternity Brothers & Sorority Sisters Confess Their Most Insane Stories
They switched jackets and you didn't notice. You made out with both of them and had no idea
the other day i was so high i found pages and pages of pictures of HD hamburgers and patriotic music. bong rips for merica.
I need to be more functional. That doesn't mean I'm going to drink less, I just need to wake up and shit
And that was the night we had mind-blowing sex with the score from Raiders of the Lost Ark blaring on vinyl in the background...
She had a tattoo of Luke Bryan on her thigh and she made me waffles. Can I have two fiancees?
I'm bathroom at buffalo wild wings
I think incapable of making pants work send help