I wish scraping a resin bowl could be considered cleaning.
she just announced that once she was paid to deep throat a light saber with a mint flavored condom on it. i'm speechless.
She has a facebook friends list called oops. theres 33 people in it. she said its all the guys she regrets fucking.
He wears a hat. All the time. Even during sex. And I'm okay with that.
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
Those people having sex on the beach kept looking over at you guys throwing his shoes at the seagulls.
They don't allow McDonald's in the ER. Go figure
I don't understand why your family and sex lives should EVER overlap.
He peed off the roof and then we bonded it was beautiful
yeah, I don't think I'm getting into the baseball game tonight. The security guard definitely saw me bowl over that child.
Just please don't close your legs while I'm down there again. I don't want my death to be labeled as "Head crushed while giving an individual cunnilingus".
Did you smoke and go to the aquarium again?
You fell out of his top bunk onto his set of golf clubs. After seeing blood on your leg, you proceeded to sing "the first cut is the deepest" while sprawled on the golf clubs
we are the best best friends ever. You had sex in an ice cream truck I had sex in a fire truck
You were in the back of the cop car and told the cop to ask me if I got laid. Youre a dedicated wingman.
Randomize
