oh. my. god. the guy i hooked up with last night is currently wearing a dress.
spell your last name, im trying to find you on facebook
She's mad at me cuz I told her having a fuck buddy was too much commitment.
Dont judge me. Him and his friends got me drunk for free, the least i could do was suck his dick
eww mummy girl is here...
what the fuckk. i just want to hold her down, wax her eyebrows, and give her some morals.
she sucked my dick to get the taste of the last guy's out. I need to find a new friend with benefits.
Would it be a dick move to report the suite next-door for a noise violation? They're singing Bad Romance off-key and I'm not sure if I can allow that.
The fire breather is here so I may get my second wind.
Playing basket ball at the park with random people that showed up at 1am. the division of teams is based on what drugs people are on
Just don't eat pie out of the sink. It's a real blow to the self esteem.
I am still sore from last night. I can't wait for you to meet my parents.
you were like "guys ... i think i got fingered while dancing tonight"
our poor poor cab driver
Just sucked some sandy dick on a boardwalk & now I'm at a family reunion hbu
Guess who just enrolled into online classes at Hogwarts? This gal.
They have a shelf full of jello shots, what have i gotten myself into
Randomize
