New word for getting laid so we don't sound like whores in public when we are talking about it : stamp the passport
Zach says you can't see his penis until after we're married...not sure why?! Bt then he said he thinks maybe you already have on the wild animal night!
Then he told me I had the most beautiful looking vulva
you were so drunk when the pizza guy got there you told him that you didn't have any money and would trade him the pizza for 3 Porno movies and he totally did it. I may never have to pay for pizza again
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's my diet secret . . . it's like slimfast but I call it cockfast instead.
Hne relally is a cite oerfect gome. Nes awddddddddooooome.
I'm going to see if it catches on fire again, then I'll make the decision.
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
Well who could blame her. I would run away from me if I could.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I ran into my parents house and stole a bottle of vodka last night...Apparently left them a note that read "DRUNK. TOOK VODKA. BRING MORE."
Just fyi there is a naked girl somewhere in your house. I woke up and she was gone, definitely left her clothes tho
I forgot her safe word. It was a rough night.
Can't find my wig, my underwear, or my dignity. Halloween 2016
Me: I shouldn't go to the airport bar it's too expensive and I don't need it. Dark me: SHOTS AT 7 AM
Put the lady boner away. He's engaged. To my brother. No, life is not fair.
Randomize