We can get Dustin to help us. I think he'd be good at luring girls into a dark alley.
Is it sanitary to roast marshmallows over a cigarette lighter?
we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said.
i'm using a wine bottle as a spitter. how classy is that.
I will return your cat, I saw a mouse in my apt last night and your door was unlocked, it seemed really practical
Should I feel guilty that my husband is cheating on his girlfriend with me? I mean, we're not divorced yet so I still have dibs, right?
You should come by for the fire station blow job tour
I feel like there's no sexy way to pull 12 condoms out of your bra.
Got too starbucks. 3out of the 4 girls working i have ducked and haven't ever called. My coffee has dick written on it. It may contain spit by pumpkin lattes are only once a year
Can we make love to the Space Jam soundtrack?
That seems dangerous to buy acid from a stranger on craigslist
Granted every 20 shifts of working there you seem to be on par to receive some sort of racy satisfying sexual encounter which money can’t buy
After the 2nd person threw up, you told us that your 'mint shooters' were just shots of mint mouthwash
I just found vampire teeth and a moustache in my purse. do you know why?
I don’t care how cute or big a guy is I’m done with drunken hand jobs. It was like I was pulling a nine inch bungee cord for 25 minutes. Now My arm and shoulder is dead
Randomize
