you dont want to live with me, im always naked, a chronic masturbator, a bit of a voyeur and will likely touch you while you sleep. ps- i can pick locks
If it has a penis then it will be stupid. Just how it works.
I just masterbated while imagining him getting hit by a truck. I have hit a completely unacceptable level of anger & bitterness. Help.
We stopped her at 12
12 shots? Or 12 midnight?
Which answer would freak you out less
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thursday was literally the first time i didnt drunk eat since the bush administration and it was only because i was fucking someones boyfriend. making a mental note to do that more often.
he'll be my respectable boyfriend for tksgiving and i'll be his non-slutty girlfriend for christmas.
and then ....
he stays my gay friend and my parents think i'm not a slut.
I would have to gauge my vagina to make it fit.
while i was sleeping he changed my screen saver to his dick with a heart frame around it. I just might be falling in love.
I loved your drunken rendition of "I wanna dance with somebody" that you left on my voicemail last night.
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Dude, just be careful. Her invitation for BJ is just a trap for her to stick her finger up your ass.
I knew it would be an interesting night when he showed up at my house on a scooter wearing a six foot american flag as a cape.
It's cosmic balancing. My vagina is an instrument of karmic retribution.
He gave me a beer, petted my head, and called me kiddo.
An d I'd rather cry while putting a waffle in my mouth than cry on my pillow, ya feel me?
Have you ever seen death before? Bc it's me right now in yesterday's clothes.
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