I mean, he's dancing back and forth between pathetically sad and massively fucking creepy.
im using the astroglide sample u sent me as a bookmark for the book im using to write my midterm paper. i need to get laid. bad.
I envy you so much. I get girls who pee on my floor and you get girls who leave in the middle of the night
next time the cops show up in riot gear we should probably leave
and miss being on the news....no way
A friday night jus isn't the same if the cops don't raid my dorm
She just got out of the car and said "hold on purse.. It's going to be a bumpy ride"
we got hammered off table wine and i ended up biting my acrylic nail off so i could finger his butt.. ill never look at valentines day the same
She's either too fat to type, hammered or has terrible spelling.
I can't come tonight. Someone took a shit in the dressing room. A.) Clean it up or B.) Kill myself. Text back with your answer.
Wow I didn't even consider the possibility of him having ED. I'm gaining so many life experiences from dating an older man
Just spent the morning washing Bailey's and Guiness out of my clothes -_-
oh so have I but I'd still suck a dick or 20 in the name of freedom.
Do you know how difficult it is to masturbate with Christmas carols stuck in your head?!
I'm at home, drunk, and I just called the guy I lost my virginity to and invited him to my wedding.. I've got to stop drinking by myself.
Who the hell tries to steal eggnog.
Randomize
