Come home. Power Hour by yourself is only fun for the first 10 minutes.
when we were having sex and i started crying and telling you i missed you..why couldnt you stop and tell me how you felt or make me feel better?you kept going...
You just got cockblocked by Conan O'Brien.
Dude...disintegrating condoms. Think about it. For all the guys that wanna go raw dog but their girls won't let them, and for the girls that wanna get pregnant but their guys don't want a kid. What do you think?
I think you've been hitting the soco too hard again.
I think whatever his name is just puked on the stairs. Just an fyi for the morning. Love you.
whoooo knowwsss what george of the jungle juice is but i feel like im in the promised land
Soo time for a life change, my 6 yr old sister made my gf a puke bucket for her birthday
I just had my first boner in 64 days today....glad to find out my fluids are still pumpin
I just commented on the education level of his penis.
I'm using my breathalyzer result sheet as a coaster for my 40.
I started having a bad trip because I closed my eyes and got lost in a forest of patterns and I knew my mom would be upset.
Why did I wake up to grapes taped my ears ?
Sorry dude, we didn't want you to hear us. Seemed like a good idea at the time.
I went on an adventure and now we have more food.
Well, really we just have fire sauce and cookies. But they're edible.
This is like 50 shades on steroids but with healthy relationship models and mutual respect among all parties involved and lesbian activity.
I just remembered that before we left my house I vowed to stay fully clothed and I FAILED
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