so the situation is a+b=c where "a" is how much you weight, "b" is my gravitational pull, and "c" is how erect your penis is.
I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
we've started having sober sex
you really do like him
Good news.. I found out what I did Saturday night. Bad news... I found out what I did Saturday night.
I dont know, my roommate got arrested but I'm gunna get some tacos no matter what
I don't know if it's lucky or if it really just makes my tits look THAT good, but I've never NOT gotten laid with this bra on
Just watched a deer get gangbanged in my front yard by 5 bucks. Wtf animal kingdom
Know of anyone who would be interested in trading weed for meatballs?
The yoga party turned into an underwear party because we are all incompetent when it comes to tying bed sheets.
This has been a Party Success Story
He kept sending me videos of his dogs while I was trying to masturbate. At what point does getting vagina-block apply?
Currently eating Dominos at the bar high as shit so that's how homework is going
Everyone says she blew me in the bathroom, so I believe it, I just don't REMEMBER.
He tried to grab your ass, but he grabbed my hand cause I grabbed your ass first. I saved your ass..literally. Your welcome.
What. The. Fuck.
You'll have to be more specific. I do a lot of "what the fuck" kind of stuff
Got upgraded to First Class and now I’ve got the whole Pacific Ocean to seduce the very hot gentleman sitting next to me!!! Door closing, wish me luck!
Randomize
