its sad that the first thing i assume is that ur trying to indirectly tell me you fucked on a breakfast table
by asking you if you bought one for the apartment?
i just woke up with two martini umbrellas taped to my nipples... idk how they got there
Sarah Palin just got hired for Fox News. Watch out Jersey Shore... there's a new drinking game in town
After Sake bombs he tried to puke into an alluminum beer bottle and shot vomit streaks in a perfect V out the sides of his mouth and hit BOTH girls he had bought drinks for that night. He was like an Icon of Cock-blocking yourself.
Call 911 I'm faking my own death so this fat chick leaves my room
Did they have a limo or was i just stoned?
Life is too short to have fake orgasms.
THERE IS AN ENORMOUS FAT WOMAN EYEING MY FLIGHT'S GATE LIKE IT WOULD BE DELICIOUS TO EAT.
according to the video, you won you first drunken karaoke contest based off of your actual singing abilities and not because you took your shirt! I've never been prouder :)
There no better feeling of self control than stopping yourself before telling your girlfriend she gives head just like her sister.
He's holding a pee stick. Yes it's weird.
Beer bong just needs to be rebedazzled but it's gonna make it
Hungover on St. Patrick's Day. I did this backwards.
I threw my shoes out of frustration and walked home barefoot... can you help me find my shoes in the morning
I was eating pickles straight from a jar, contemplating doing something productive. What did I miss?
Randomize
