I woke up at 5am and he was watching me sleep... Come get meee!!??
I need to buy a mesh tank top to fit in in Florida. Where do they even sell that shit?
well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
alright so where did all these fingerpaintings on my bedroom wall come from?
dude. you drew those with your dick
they just tried to tell me they weren't big into drugs. A) it was the 70's. B) I've seen the pictures.
What's the kids name that was drinking stale beer and redbull out of the blender?
I just found your spare underwear and the half eaten granola bar you left in my purse.
He was singing Justin Beiber while we did it. I love secure Spanish men
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Amazing. Super drunk. We stole a street sign in a golf cart and went around jousting trash cans all night.
Nothing is more awkward than taking a dump while someone is crying in the bathroom.
You know it's been a while when you're having to resort to positive conditioning to get women
You passed out with your mouth on the faucet, straddling the keg, with your arms wrapped around it
He said I could stop sending ass pics now and just say hello. I'm not sure if that means he's no longer interested, or that he's a gentleman??
i know were having a "heart to heart" right now, but does it make you feel uncomfortable that im sexting someone right now?
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