If a girl drunk dials you she's at least entertained the idea of sleeping w/ you correct?
YES
he came on my stomach, took his sock off, wiped it up, put his sock back on along with his shoes and left.
and then we had to stop you from trying to pour shots through your nose with the neti pot.
I'm also 3/4 on the frats. Its like my goal of traveling to all 7 continents, but different somehow and a lot less morally sound.
Why is Kyle using one of my nieces as a blunt object to provoke and attack my other niece?
I just remember being in the bathroom alone cussing out the bunny
Do you know how hard it is to was the scent of sex from your hair in a gas station bathroom?!
I feel like these arent even my fingers anymore
This drunk lesbian I just met keeps trying to shove sushi in my mouth. Help.
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
I knew you were cut off when you tried to order a "Phil Collins"
That awkward moment when you're drunk enough to crave cocaine, but you're sober enough to know it's only Tuesday.
Basically I think I'm replacing men/sex with theme parks.
I'm about to take plan-b with a glass of wine and ramen noodles. I cannot decide who will hurt more...my vagina, my kidneys or my pride.
My vagina likes him more than I do, but I’m going to follow her lead and see what happens
Randomize
