I wish I could tape me & him having sex. Not for pornographic reasons, just for comic relief.
the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
there's a sign at taco bell and it says "bacon and ranch make everything better." it speaks to me.
When the officer tried to stop you, you just shouted your name in his face. repeatedly.
Pretty sure i didnt get thrown out cause why dont i have more bloody areas
She. Own s my pussycat. Roxk it like. The sun hitting the horizon
i'm in that phase where i'll swallow anything except food
You could become Eskimo brothers with my dad. How can you pass that up? You pussy.
So, I'm tripsitting Ruben cause he's on LSD, and he's starting to eat the chair because 'it is evil' according to him... I can't choose: should I stop him or film it?
The drunk mom in a firefighter hat just told her to leave.
Body paints and jello. Your canvas awaits
Another sexterpiece awaits
for me, it's working out the tricky timing of the Viagra and nightly laxative.
I'm trying to be celibate. I'm having me time. I'm eating cake.
I was stuffing my face while buying a brownie and coffee and some kid I fucked came up behind me and said. Someone's hungry.
All I recall is being at the strip club doing dark rum shots and then puking a question mark on the wall above the garbage can in the men's room and having diarrhea in the sink. 6th drunkest I've ever been without blacking out.
Randomize
