He was dressed in cheap leather and smelled like death.
just got drunk at a party with Christmas themed solo cups.. holidays are officially here.
then we talked for a little and he asked my last name which since I have yet to get a fb request I'm 95% sure its for a restraining order
just witnessed some guy trade his friend $5 and a condom for his keys.
Please fuck him. And then let me tell her. And then let me protect you from the knife she pulls from her Ed Hardy purse. Please.
Dude. I have been looking at your movie history on netflix and it is like looking at the rings of a tree. Only instead of telling me how old you are, it tells me when you were stoned.
I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
He tipped the stripper with quarters. After that not even the waitress would talk to us. I had to move to another table to get a lapdance
i'm using salt from the free peanuts to stop the bleeding.
By this time tomorrow I expect us to be sitting at the kitchen table either playing a drinking game, or crying. Set an alarm
Today is leap day..... If that's not an excuse to blackout all day I don't know what is
I just hit myself in the face while taking off my shirt. I could never be a stripper.
I want to pinterest what I want to do with my pubes. Why isn't there a board for that?!
Micheal let me call him captain america while we fucked. It was awesome
You know you're high when you find yourself sitting on the floor with the refrigerator door open, talking to various foods. Hand gestures and all.
Randomize
