Having him eat chocolate out of you is not as romantic as it sounds. I'm still finding pieces.
It snowed today. The whore-inducing weather is official over.
Great News, you CAN smoke bowls with a magnifying glass
I'm standing in line at the liquor store and they're making popcorn.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im 95% ready to shit behind 711
OK WHO CHANGED MY RING TONE TO LADY AND THE TRAMP AND CHANGED EVERY CONTACT IN MY PHONE TO 'SOME GUY I FUCKED'?
You grabbed her hand and started jacking her finger off. She was horrified.
Did it finish?
I feel as if we moved beyond the hook up stage when she blew me as I drunkenly finished my chicken nuggets.
I love being high. The owl outside stopped who-ing and I could swear I just heard someone say, "Okay, that's a wrap!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just fell off my bed trying to pose and take a nude for you. Probably broke my wrist
So what did you do since you didn't go out?
...ate chocolate and watched bring it on....it's like I don't even know what it would look like to be straight.
We inadvertently arrived at the strip club on Bear Night. The dancers all look like young Santa Claus and there's a buffet....
She broke up with me. I guess I was in the most chaste lesbian relationship in the history of the world and had no idea.
When did we go from stumbling drunk into an ER at 3am to dinner double dating?
There's a guy masturbating in front of Sephora right now
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