fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
We pay for beer, you give birth. It's how the world works.
I just ran into the couch, vagina first.
I hope you got dinner out of it
He just gave a drunken 7 minute speech on how to make the perfect grilled cheese. he explained types of butter and cheeses....i think i love him
your friend did not want a bj. we need to leave. this is very awkward.
Swear to god, if I have to wingman for you on my honeymoon I'm gonna be pissed
he just flipped me off the bed, said "deal with it", and came on me.
Do you think making a dress out of an "Open" flag that my friend stole from a bar, and wearing it out sends the wrong message? ....Or exactly the right message?
Made out with a chick in front of a girl I'm banging and successfully reDENNISed her within 9 hours
I am pretty sure we beat baby seals over the head in a past life. That is why we are being punished.
I'm about to be a GTA V widow, he could at least throw me a bone. Literally.
That's probably when I climbed a tree and told everyone I was an ornament
My eczema on my back is flaring up so he rubbed coconut oil on it while we were boning down. If that's not a picture of 8 years married I dunno what is.
he just got here with a handle of tequila and box of condoms. looks like i'll be spending the weekend in bed
I had to break up with her. She was sending me study schedules and recipes for vegan lasagna. I’m just trying to survive man
Randomize
