Shitting during a conference call is so empowering.
Do you remember peeing on the wall and then yelling at us to stop looking at your dick?
9 am. shotgunning while conditioning my hair. i love college football season.
I just turned in a 4 page paper spelling absolute as "absolut" every single time. I'm an alcoholic
He filled our room with little plastic cups of beer so the only way I could get out was by drinking them all.
he was wearing ninja turtle pajamas and he STILL got laid. who the fuck is this guy?!
Come down. You're the next contestant on this bowl.
So he might be the smartest man alive. He had the stripper pick him up taco bell on the way to the room for an extra 50 bucks.
A whole bunch of large men eating Doritos just knocked on my door and asked if they could take out my trash?
So the old dude that tried to fight me is definitely Katie's dad. And the pot cookie's kicking in. Shit is getting weird.
some how during sex we caught an ENTIRE pillow on fire. A WHOLE PILLOW.
I'm making mistakes. Coming up with girl now
I hate me. That girl was hiiiiideous.
please come back they are interrogating me about masturbation
His idea of a night out is drinking beer in the driveway. He's been on house arrest too long
I think my life is a one-way ticket to blackout city.
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