is it bad that the economy has gotten so bad that finding cheap gas gives me the same excitement and joy as finding a hot, blonde haired, blue eyed, tall, athletic single straight guy?
i think the next time he gets me off i'm going to scream bangarang
ru fi oooo
Don't get me started, it sucks when the one thing you have in common with a girl is not wanting penis inside you.
Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
I forgot to tell you thank you for putting me out when I was on fire. im sure I'll laught about this someday...
Just spent the last 5 minutes laughing at my epipen. i think i'm too high.
can't believe I traded a good night's sleep and a midterm for your blurry tits
The waitress at the airport bar just asked me if I wanted a "to go" beer, hahahahaha OF COURSE I WANT A TO GO BEER.
I didn't know. I guess I really haven't had that much time for drinking lately. I mean, outside drinking at home/work.
I hear jingle bells and I can't tell if it's bc I'm feeling festive or just REALLY high
last night we watched this really loud chick try and pick up this smoking french guy who's english was sooo bad. she finally pointed at her beer and then her vagine
gross
like you've never done an interperative dance for sex, please
He did a backflip because drugs
It feels like heartburn in my lungs. I'll buy 2 pounds.
I was just in the bathroom and some guy yelled all hail the king... i cant go anywhere without getting recognized anymore.
So a bottle of lube exploded all over my softball bag and Nike shirt.
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