OMG I just tried to text you something dirty but accidentally texted the obama campaign
I have the worst farts today, I'm walking by the cubicles of people I don't like and leaving them surprises. Brb.
dude that girl has seen more cock ends then weekends
the red, white, and blue power rangers were all also in the porn buisness, good bye childhood
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
ONE NIGHT STAND. You have 27 minutes before the offer expires, so I suggest you hurry.
Just remember that she is a giant dick-sucking forehead and you are better than that.
He lectured me about the dangers of drugs while wearing a sombrero and doing interpretive dance.
You'd think somebody who rolls blunts like jesus himself could roll a god damn burrito
Basically I don't wanna put on pants...but I'm stoked for drinking my face off tomorrow.
I lost a whole day of my life. Apparemtly I was using my deodrant as a phone. And is my phone there?
"YOU ALWAYS BEEN A HOE YOU ALWAYS GONE BE A HOE. THAT'S JUST THE WAY IT'S GONE BE." overheard at temple
is that a sigh of girlish delight, or "sigh...I'm having a herpes outbreak'
Can't it be both?
I love getting kicked out of places. Its like winning a little league game
Yeah, so if you ever try to steal it, just know my tongue's been on it in several occasions. All over it.
Randomize
