BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
Did i throw a brick at someone last night?
Confirm for me that it's be a bad idea to sleep with the 50 year old that's currently hitting on me?
that bitch in the red sedan is still teasing me with the ice cream cone. i'm going to show her my dick
As i looked at his penis, it stared back into my soul. No more drinking games.
You slow clapped the stripper last night.
I was looking at your puke while I was peeing in it the next morning and that ceasar salad did not treat you well
No. I'm too high for this. I gotta focus my mind for my future Hooter's interview
I vaguely remember making out with his tattoo (?) and giving him an awesome massage and then I passed out on his floor. Shrug
you were like "guys ... i think i got fingered while dancing tonight"
our poor poor cab driver
Someone drunkenly cleaned and organized my car last night... Nothing's missing, so that's a plus.
I woke up to pizza pinned to my wall. So that's that.
Is using La Croix as a mixer for vodka a legit way to reach my daily water consumption?
You think your roommate is bad? The guy they paired me with is such a nerd, his very presence at a party blocks every cock in the room.
My theme for the night was drink diego drink! Unfortunately Dora was not there to navigate me to the bathroom
Randomize