i wants your nipples near my face. PLEASE????
Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
Have u ever been so drunk that pissing urself felt like a better idea than walking to the bathroom? I entered those waters last night
Im sure that doesnt mean its ruined... It was your bithday you get a free "im drunk at 7 am" card
Today's lesson: while in the shower, one should choose between either drinking OR shaving. Not both.
i just drank the rest of the vodka . Btw why did we put candy corn in it?
he turned down sex AND sandwiches. who the hell does that?!
im sure shes a lovely person but i cant be friends with someone that doesnt drink. its just not right.
She was eating leaves off of trees and saying it was salad, and even told a guy in passing that her favorite color was plaid.
25 likes of a picture on Instagram of my butthole. beat that.
I think I blacked out after I decided drinking alone on the trailered jetskis was a good idea
he would snap chat his dick as like Harry Potter
You've opened Pandora's butthole my friend. There's no going back.
The sad moment you remember you have no power for a week and can't flush.....
Wrong number bro but that sounds like a damn shame.
Booze, boobs, blunts and batman. dude, I'm livin' the life.
Randomize
