I'm walking behind a man wearing a womans shirt, heels, mens pants and a baseball hat
He came and then made the Jim Halpert face. does that say disappointment or what
I haven't even gone in yet. I'm sitting in the waiting room playing a game i like to call "Who else is here for AA".
They have beer in plastic boots. How am I supposed to resist that?
I'm going to die alone in a sea of empty vodka bottles and cats.
don't worry i just saved a song to my personal usb drive to give to the dj at the bar. he's playing old school jlo whether he likes it or not.
I feel like this is going to result in some sort of tearing in my vagina.
Thats a chance were just gonna have to take
sooo what's the appropriate music to listen to after you find out the dude you been fucking, is legit married with kids...what genre is that?
well this is gonna sound really bad but we were fooling around on sandra's electrical wheelchair
drinking from the bathtub cause I'm too lazy to walk downstairs and too thirsty to care
I just googled, "how to do boob makeup" thats the kind of night I wanna have.
im gonna shove his purity ring down his throat
Just threw up in a baggy on the airplane. The guys next to me clapped and bought me a jack and coke.
Livin the dream
Someone needs to get Mark off the roof. I told you that he doesn’t shut up about ancient Egypt if you give him henny.
So...I'm pretty sure I have officially determined that reverse cowgirl is the only position possible to have sex in my smart four two
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