I can't believe he cheated
Whatever. Anytime she has an orgasm, it's because I taught him how
I need to stop hooking up with boys in my major. three boys in one class is just a litttle too awkward.
I have a very hazy flashback of me making out with a guy in a seashell bra??! Can you confirm or deny
Trust me that one dick you don't want. It's like a whale... That's swam too many oceans...
Let's not fuck on an air mattress tonight...I'd rather get rug burn.
Well it ended with everyone taking a bite out of a raw potato and a girl crying because her boyfriend wouldn't bring her any grape juice. So yeah...I'd say the night was a success.
how do you politely tell someone their toddler looks alarmingly similar to the berries and cream guy
The smoothie place is closed, but the liquor store is open and wine is kinda like a smoothie.
In other news, I tore a tendon in my hand from giving my boyfriend handjobs so that's how my day is going
Im selling my dirty underwear to pay for that cruise. NO JUDGEMENT . I love you lol ❤❤ also dont tell anyone
He makes furniture for a living and is basically a hot, younger Ron Swanson
TJ is going to paint me in a Patriots Jersey he can paint you in an eagle jersey. Did this last year and got so much dick.
Ok. After that I think I'm going to drag queen jello wrestling if you would care to join.
If I knew the person sucking my dick didn't say thank you for their Christmas presents I wouldn't be able to cum.
i just remember singing the theme song from 2 and 1/2 men to my hair
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