Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
just heard 2 nerds making fun of a girl for mispronouncing stochiometry. they followed it up by discussing the mathematical equation for getting laid. my day just became 100x better.
I picked her up for our first date on a fucking horse. Of course I got a BJ.
Oh it's happening. I'm Chugging a beer while sitting next to a 6 year old
Okay, lets just agree to keep all cutlery related activities to a minimum.
Ya well my good-girl image was pretty much blown when he found out I'm going to jail soon.
we went to the bar with our boss and you tried to play a song from the atm machine
He fucked me so hard I had an asthma attack. I'm like the sickly poster child for celibacy.
How did "just two beers for happy hour" turn into naked backyard wrestling?
She insisted we fuck to Ludacris, not how I imagined popping her lesbian cherry would be. I tried delt and I liked it.
My concierge just asked me to his place for dinner while I was signing for a delivery. The delivery was a box of vibrators. Let's discuss.
So please don't worry, but I need some help getting blood out of my drywall so I can get my security deposit back. I would not ask if the need was not great.
but seriously, an anthropology paper shouldn't be hard if you're trashed, right?
You stared at a Swedish dude for like 5 minutes then asked him "shouldn't you be yelling at dragons"
I should be in a better mood, I just went home and had a quickie on my lunch break.
I had a sandwich.
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