It has to be really easy to get midgets drunk.
I got a bikini wax for the first time today and I think I now understand feminism.
i think i am going to devote my summer to making my cats internet celebrities
Drunk versus high capture the flag: what team is everybody gonna be on?
Yessssssssss. I got taped to a couch last night apparently. I also thought i was close to scoring after talking to some chick about hard boiled eggs
Apparently suggesting that she was the kind of girl who might be expected to kill someone's pets hurt her feelings...
For future reference "bring our litter sisters on our date day" is not such a good idea
He ate shrooms at 9:30, said, "see you later," and left. I am alone on New Years.
We fucked on a kid's slide, my vagina is singing praises of being used
If I learned anything from that one time I saw the last 10 minutes of oprah when they talked about the secret, it is that you project what you receive back. I also have wine.
She brought me back a blanket from Mexico, then we had sex on it
I refuse to plan drunken casual sex. Just think of the monster I'd create.
One of my favorite March activities is cropdusting people while wearing a kilt.
You let the ASEXUAL teach sex Ed?!
I need to bang the neighbor boy. He’s given three women screaming orgasms this week alone.
Also, my apartment walls are too thin
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