Her best guy friend really had a thing for her all along.... Now we're back together and he's gone Dawson's Creek with his away messages.
thats the last time i clean cum out of my retainer.
Does slim fast make a chocolate heart for valentines? If so that's what she's getting.
The one from last night got me a whole floor of Eskimo Brothers. There was a celebration of high fiving as I left
Forgot to mention there might be a picture of me being thrown in the air while at a Mexican restaurant
well as your friend its only fair to offer my cock for your services. Cause I care.
Why am I the only one concerned that there's a dog in the movie theatre?
how the hell did this chicken wing end up in my cast?!
She needs to go. She is like the Yoko Ono of our group.
U have successfully fucked my brains out. I just almost put deodorant on like chapstick
I can't believe you're forcing me to handle this hangover sober
I refuse to believe this is a lapse in my dick hunting skills. It's gotta be the gods playing a game.
And two different second-graders said my make up was pretty. It's left over from last night bc I woke up 5 min before I was supposed to leave.
No I didn't say it was safe, I said it was legal. I didn't say anything about it being safe. It's not my fault if you weren't listening properly.
He’s got a big dick and a big ego. This could be fun
Randomize
