That's what you get when you play shuffleboard drunk.
why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
Take xtc, wait 20 minutes and then take a shower. Trust me.
The greatest thing of my life happened today. I took a shit and it formed a smiley face. It's going to be a fucking fantastic day.
you threw your tampon into someones open car window...while they were driving.
I threw up so much beer last night that my puke had a nice head on it.
The only thing worse than being arrested is the fact the cop confiscated my green dinosaur costume.
Don't bother coming over to clean the mess. I already paid two kids 5 bucks for it, just didn't tell them you peed all over the place. You do owe me 5 bucks though
Eric and I just went in the hallway to practice our new handshake in a real life situation at live speeds. That high.
Just had the best idea EVER: start a mead brewing/dispensery business! WE CAN BREW IT IN MY GIANT CLOSET, AND NEVER BE SOBER AGAIN.
Nothing bonds a father and daughter like washing her puke off the front steps
Fulfilled a bucket list goal last night. Borrowed a dollar from a stripper to buy smokes
God bless Atlanta.
This reminds me of the time I was given a lap dance by a David Bowie drag king...
I forgot drug dealers have families, too. Cheers to a sober, uncomfortable, slightly enraging Thanksgiving.
I’m not closing myself off the to the possibility of making a bad life choice.
Randomize
