Is it awkward that I've slept with every guy in this room?
Only if they know about it too.
left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
Now that I'm 21, I feel like I'm letting North Dakota down by not being drunk everyday
you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
I passed out with my wizard stick taped to my hands and got woken up being poked with a St. Bernard
Her only article of clothing is an American Flag
Oh yeah and one of the strippers brought you chips and water when you were passes out next to the toilet. So that was nice
Sweet tea and masterbation. It's how I manage.
Dude. Went to buy some jack and sailor Jerry, when the guy at the counter realized it was my birthday everybody in the store including the stoners and the elderly sang to me. Then they gave me shots of moonshine. 21st bday was a success
Is using cherry lube as jam shameful or hilarious
I think if I send him enough nudes, he will buy my plane ticket.
New rule: if you don't think racism exists, you don't get to put your penis inside me.
What kind of true American would I be if I didn't just smoke weed in my bathrobe on my back porch in the middle of suburbia on 4/20? #stepmomoftheyear
I still have to bake cookies and shave my legs so Mike can have MILF & cookies when he gets home.
I need to get laid. Right now that freshman frat pledge & my Econ professor are the leading candidates
That’s quite a spread
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