i kept saying "bloody hell" in a ron weasley accent until i forcibly told myself to shut up
I should be nowhere even remotely near facebook in this condition.
my little brother just asked me why i have handcuffs. How do I tell him that his sister likes being taken advantage of in the bedroom?
He painted his chest for the game... I just fucked an exclamation point.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its name is Richard. And I think he formally introduced us.
Im pretty sure it started going awry when I asked their mom "How much would it cost me to sleep with your daughters"
"The juvenile turned and faced the officer, unzipped his pants, placed a fresh cigarette in between his legs and preceded to light it with a match"
I woke up to a gnawing sound in the middle of the night and asked him what it was. He told me it was the family of squirrels that lives in the wall and to go back to sleep.
Why do the people I hook up with still exist after we're done?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We were fucking while the tv was on, and one of those animal cruelty commercials came on. We then switched over and started doing it doggy style. It was then that I realized that I'm going to hell.
That's why god made go-pro's and tequila
Damn Instagram explore page. I am six months in to some girl I don't even know.
I'm constantly crying, and now I start crying every time I masturbate which is a fun development.
how much of this shit do i need to take before i think its a good idea to set the house on fire and scream satanic mantras?
This pandemic, it’s making everyone horny. I’ve got dick stashed all over town
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