just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
You finger a girl once and she thinks she loves you. I'm going back to boys. Lesbians are needy.
the last 2 times weve had drunk sex ive had to get the morning after pill.. he's turning into a real expensive fuck buddy.
Just found a picture of me licking the bouncers ear last night
My printer just jammed because one of the condom wrappers I threw when we had sex in my dorm
I've come to realize sober is a rare time of the day.
Ya he's alive. Apparently he's been drinking Naty and listening to Unbreak My Heart on repeat all day.
Also, the greatest of ironies: I got shampoo confiscated by security while Corey managed to get pot through. MERICA!
I have good news and bad news. Bad news, she's not in porn. Good news, I found porn.
its gotten to the point where if her hand isn't on my butt i think we're in a fight
I ordered more beers for everyone but had to finish them all. I promptly went outside and projectile vomited in the street. Three times.
They should make eskimo sister bracelets. OMG WE NEED BRACELETS WITH IGLOOS ON THEM.
Teach me the ways of your demonic sorcery.
I’ve cut back on drinking and now my body can’t fight off all the bad germs without the alcohol. That’s why I keep getting sick
no dude he sent me cemetery flowers, i know it. they are half dried out roses in the shape of a cross, seriously. and he is not religious. so he robbed a freaking grave site for me. am i like an accessory to grave robbing now??
damnit this is what you get for dating guys with neck tattoos
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