have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
So you really shouldn't go around telling people you're fireproof
my mom just asked me why she found a half-eaten burrito in the hamper
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
I don't see what kind of idea someone could get from an envelope covered in jesus stickers and a note from a person and their dog. I'd say crazy person alert before flirting.
Are you drunk? Because I am and if you're not, this may be very awkward in the morning
Thats for me to know and you to find out.
No I did not just post a Craigslist ad for a used stripper pole because I can't afford my own. But now that you put the idea in my head I might have to.
Last night I said "I'm so glad you broke up with your lesbian soccer mom girlfriend" I don't remember how he reacted I just remember trying to pee in the woods
If I learned anything from that one time I saw the last 10 minutes of oprah when they talked about the secret, it is that you project what you receive back. I also have wine.
I'm gone to the point of literally hugging trees, partially for support, but also because I like them.
I can't believe I haven't fucked an Elvis impersonator yet.
So the next time I search for "Dragon Dildo" on my phone, I should probably clear the browser before handing my phone to someone and that's the first thing they see haha
Drunk and bowling. Only good things can come of this
Don't come in. My door to my bathroom won't close because of the table and I'm pooping
Classy
Randomize
