question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
i fell off the bed in the middle of it, and he yelled "5 second rule" and kept fucking me. i think im in love
we fucked to don't stop believing. most epic sex EVER.
Housing came buy and confiscated our shopping cart :(
Come down here. We are watching people walk through the paper we taped in front of the elevator.
they still hired me even though my background check came back with a warrent for my arrest.
The guy I fucked in San Diego is camping with us for coachella... Awk.
It was the best present I've gotten since I was 5 and I got a fucking easy bake oven. I'm not pregnant for realsies. Celebratory party at the house tonight. Invite all the nice dicks you know.
there's nothing weirder than waking up to your mom eating breakfast on the couch that you fucked her coworker on last night.
Do you have any pictures of me mounting animals that aren't on Facebook?
Just woke up from a dream where I had lesbian sex with myself (a clone of me)... Take that, Freud!
Last night I dreamed that I got eaten out by Lego Harry Potter.
and then I said "oh, I see the price of Plan B has gone up". and the pharmacist looked at me very sadly. I was just trying to make conversation.
I'm doing the walk of shame into my therapists office wearing his clothes...I guess go big or go home
I just called my grandma crying, apologizing for being the first grandchild to have premarital sex...I'm either about to start my period or pregnant.
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