Do you know a sam ****, im at the bar right now and lookin for some dirt on her to guilt trip her in to sex
I just sat in the Taco Bell drive-thru waiting for a trash can to take my order. Yes, that high.
At least we kept it together. It's people like him who yell at bushes that give acid a bad name
He blew a load on his roommates pillow just to piss him off. Why did you introduce me to these people?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
....I found a picture of what appears to be the underneath side of the barstool (taken from the floor) and to top that, 9 pictures of the ceiling. Also, did I mention there's a picture with us posing with a pregnant lady at the bar?! WELP
Sex on roller skates
Floating mattress
Tie
She walked home carrying a six pack of beer and someone elses cat
SHE BETTER HAVE BROUGHT BACK MY FUCKING COUCH CUSIONS OR SHES GUNNA GET IT.
this is the first time i'm angry at someone with so much boobs. she like managed to break my glass and my phone with one glorious swing
I remember you fighting a small man for the last of the pizza. Was there a midget in my house last night?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm going to a one year olds birthday party to smoke weed. What has my life become.
I had a dream last night that I used a condom when I had sex. That's how I knew it was a dream
You know you hit Mardi Grad bottom when you come to in someone's kitchen on the floor and you are eating gumbo out of a Mixing bowl with a ladle......yeah rock fucking bottom
she grabed my junk and started making lightsaber noises
I wonder if you could get her in a metal bikini
someone stole my phone at the bar last night, naturally, it led to me waking up in the bartender’s bed
And to be clear I have only watched porn like 3 times at work
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