It must be a full moon weekend. All of my weird booty calls are coming out of the woodwork. I spent 40 minutes on the phone last night telling one why he is so creepy.
Note: footlong is not the password to the subway wi fi network.. p.s- im super high
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
no sex. but he left me weed, so almost as good.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ok I might come if this chair quits being so great...I'm also seeing this bush in the corner turn into a witch
i'm gonna need a rally to restore sobriety after this weekend...
were lost, were cold and we don't know what to do with the stray cat we found.
She just rubbed her face all over pool chalk. I feel like it's time to go
I'm so hungover all I can do is stare at my curser and hope it starts moving on its own
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
As I type I'm climbing my cousins swingset so I can take a nap inside the slide. Fuck this hangover. I always win.
Oh Brad. Your poor brain, always being ignored for your penis and crazy women.
New reason to drink: alcohol makes soda taste like goddamn gold.
I had to help him get his zipper down in front of his dad so he could pee in the bushes. That Is what moonshine does to you.
so then the cop took one last hit off our blunt and then drove off in his car and we just all stood there thinking, yea... that just happened...
How much glitter would I have to ingest in order for a "magnificent" amount to appear in my ejaculate?
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